All eyes on us

They watch us all the time.  Even when we don't notice, they are watching.  Learning.  Thinking.  Deciding how and what they want to "be".  Deciding if they want to be like us.  Or not.

I've always known that my living example to my children, whether good or bad, is more powerful than anything I will ever say.  I am grateful for such amazing kids and so thankful that the Big Man Upstairs had enough faith and trust in me to let me be their mom.  I pray every day - every single day - for help to be a good mother.  And I pray that as I am ever-so-human and make many mistakes along the way, that they will know I am trying, really really trying hard to be the best I can be.  For them.  For me.  For our family. 
It's seems like as of late, parenting has been on my mind so much.  As I've taken opportunities to counsel with my precious peeps about things going on in their lives, trials they are facing, emotions they are reconciling, I've asked myself if I'm doing this right.  Am I teaching them what they need to know to become a successful adult?  Am I helping them develop their faith?  Am I too tough on them? Or not tough enough?  Am I showing them how important it is to stay strong and healthy and fit?  Am I giving them enough opportunties to "choose" and exercise their agency and learn to responsible?

I was firm with the one about a grade that we both felt was unacceptable given her smarts and her gifts and her upbringing.  She knew it wasn't her best and so did I.  We talked a lot about expectations, abilities, and what is means to be our best.  I asked her how she felt about this whole situation, and although she quickly responded that she knew she hadn't been putting her forth her best, she said she didn't feel that bad considering how she was doing in comparison to some of her friends.

Oh no you didn't just say that.
Stop the show.

Bring out the soapbox because my "life is too short to be mediocre" lesson is about to begin. 

I reminded her that there are all kinds of average people out there - people who are content to just get by, content with doing the bare minimum.  In short, content with being mediocre.  We are not those kind of people.  Each of us is born with our own package of gifts and talents and just like the parable of the 10 talents, we are each commanded to work with what we've been given and make the most of them.  The fly on our wall has oft been blessed to hear my well rehearsed, but 100% sincere, speil about doing our best.  I tell my kids that if they work hard and bust their tails and the best they can bring home is a C, then I'd be as happy as I could be.  But they are not C students, and in fact, are not B students.  They are capable of excellence and have shown it over and again, so that is what we expect.  She got it.  I think they all get it and probably always have.  Sometimes we just need reminders.

Monday evening when I got home from work, the two youngest girls had both our yoga mats spread out in the family room and were mimicking Tony Horton and his crew as they worked through the P90X Stretch-X routine.  I couldn't help but smile.  They were so stinking cute.  How many times have they seen Ryan and I pull out those mats and plug in those DVD's over the years?  Apparently, Rowan wanted to "limber up" so she could perfect her splits, and Afton wanted to loosen up her muscles since she's been running a lot.  (BTW - Afton was the fastest in her class and is representing her class in the team relay race at this Friday's Track and Field Day.  She is sooooo excited!)  She's doing the softball throw and cross country event too and wants to be her best.  She wants to be fast.  Hmmmm...I wonder where she gets that?

I know they are watching.  Sometimes when the week seems too busy to steal away for 2 hours to the Big White House down on Main, I think about them.  They need to see me go always.  They need to know that I love that place and that it's important to me to be there every week. 

They watch us work.  They see us run.  They see us sweat and do hard things.  They see us date.  They know we love the Lord and that we think it's important to be kind, kind, kind.  They know that church attendance and softball practice are pretty much non-negotiable.  They know we don't tolerate whining and that anything short of 100% honesty isn't going to cut it in our family.  They know we love them beyond measure and that all their friends are welcome in our home. 

How do they know?

They see.  They watch.  They learn so fast.