Best

I had an email conversation with a very good friend of mine yesterday about our kids, their education, our school system, and our dreams. Admittedly, I haven’t really thought outside the box that much when it comes to education. I was a product of the public school system, and I think I turned out OK. Reflecting back to my formative years, I think I had a good overall experience, learned quite a bit, studied hard, got good grades, earned a scholarship and went on to get my fully-paid-for degree at a state university. I starting interviewing for my first real career job during my senior year at ASU, and had my job offers lined up before I graduated. Launch career mode and I’ve never really looked back.

Nothing too out of the box about it.

And even though I dealt with the all the normal stresses of teenage life and was subject to the influences of the world through my years in the public schools, I am still glad I went through it. Sure, I wish I would have made some different choices and bypassed some “leaning opportunities” that came via consequences of poor choices. But who wouldn’t say that? I’d be shocked if any of us now functioning, basically-on-the-right-track parents could look back to our youth and say with sincerity that they would have done it all the same. I think we all wish we’d made some different choices here and there.

But even with all that, I loved high school. (I probably could have done without junior high, but I pretty much think that’s a globally accepted view with 20+ years of hindsight.) I loved going to football games, school dances, seminary, student council, orchestra, being on the softball and volleyball teams, going out for lunch with a carload of girlfriends, dating, social life, and yes…school. I have a lot of fun memories about growing up. All of that – the good and the bad - at least in some way was part of the “coming of age” process that made me who I am today.

So when Ryan and I started our family years ago, I guess I really always thought that my kiddos would follow a similar track. Even though our children are still quite young, we have always stressed the importance of doing well in school. Study hard. Get your homework done before you play.

Do your best!
Do your best!
Do your best!

They’ve all listened to my stories about working hard in school and how it all paid off in the end. Even my 9 year old knows all about scholarships and is working hard to get one. They don’t talk about college as in “if” I go, but “when” I go and “where” I’ll go. The expectation and bar has been set high, and I’m OK with that. OK because all I can really ask and hope for is that they do their best, and if their best is outstanding, then so be it. That’s their bar. They are reaching it. God blessed them with great minds. They can do anything they put their minds to.

Now…with all that being said, I have to admit that my perspective was broadened and my “ in-the-box” thinking was challenged a bit as I listened to the perspective of my dear friend. She’s setting a new bar with her family and challenging the status quo. She’s helping her kids reach their “best” in ways I’d never even contemplated. They are learning and thriving and undoubtedly, will be successful in their endeavors. Those kids come from a great home with amazing parents and are destined for greatness.

The world today is so different than when I was in school, and that wasn’t even that long ago. It was just 20 years ago that I graduated from high school, which in the grand scheme of things, isn’t that long ago at all. With public displays of homosexuality being generally accepted as “normal” on many high school campuses today, rampant drug use, widespread pornography, tattoos and body piercings abounding, foul language, and all other sorts of indecency that is part of today’s socially accepted pop culture, it made me really start to wonder.

Wonder if my kids will have what it takes to withstand the temptations of the world as they make their way through their teenage years.

Wonder if we are teaching them enough.

Wonder if we are bearing enough testimony of gospel truths.

Wonder if they’ll find good friends to help keep them on the straight and narrow.

Wonder if the educational “track” we are on is the best one for our children.

Wonder if my “best” as a parent will be enough to help them become their best.

So as I contemplated all these things as I drove to the temple this morning in the dark, quiet hours, and then sat in that beautiful room at the end of my session, I offered one of the most earnest prayers I can remember offering in quite a long time. It wasn’t long or complex. But the tears flowed as I poured out my heart in gratitude for our children and asked for help as I strive to be my best for them.